In a sense not expressible

I haven’t written in 4 days. I thought I was starting something lasting, revolutionary in my own mind and new way of being.

Maybe I am, but I’m also just a regular person.

Why did I not wake up until 11 a.m. yesterday? Oh it was because of watching Bryan Simpson, with one of the best-written comedy sets I’ve ever seen. His intelligence is undeniable, and it is clear he has been around many men who are not aware of themselves…much less women.

Then I watched Mike Epps. I don’t remember liking Mike Epps back in the day, but this hour special was damn good. It seems like his weight of presence and delivery finally matches his age, and what he says hits the right way.

And then I found jokes entering my head in Mike Epp’s voice. I swear they were totally original, but I forgot all of them.

Maybe I should stick to my day job.

I find myself unable to fully form thoughts and expressions of myself now fully, while mildly abandoning daily duties in a way that still allows me to be viewed as functional but staying any real productivity that I would be satisfied with.

Is this mild sabotage deliberate, or subconscious?

I simply cannot answer that question, because my mind isn’t working as it should.

I will try and write more so I am useful again.