On Fallen Apples…

I came here again

Probably because there isn’t really anything else I know how to do

When that panging warp of energy drags my body down into itself

Beckoning me back to my beginnings

or more to the point,

Demanding that I attend to something

I’ve been avoiding or assuming daily life or other relationships

Won’t let me get to…

As if I don’t have the ability or the time to prioritize the only real gift I have,

which is observation.

But what does it really mean to observe?

What are we really able to do with our known senses,

and do we ever really pay attention?

What do we truly remember?

The Enlightenment surely helped us out of pure dogma

wedded to serfdom,

because we had no other choices

when kings controlled all resources

and spiritual life was the only solidification

of freedom,

the first code switching of the imperiled masses.

But we are stuck in a purgatory of Newtonian landscapes,

as if 18th century physics had any moral application to begin with.

The only moral framework worth displaying

is to reject charisma for facts

Because without real dedication to factual occurences

Anything is possible

and everyone is expendable.

But we also do not know what to believe

and who to become.

That should be a freeing revelation,

because freedom also brings terror;

Terror of not knowing what any particular path will bring

and choosing it consciously anyway

knowing that you may look around 30 years later

and find yourself

and your surroundings

totally unrecognizeable…

Or you can stay in the same place for 30 years

and remain intimately familiar

with what you’ve always known

But with the first large rain

Larger than you’ve ever experienced

or a marching brigade

of foreign people

You now are confronted

with unrecognizable circumstances

and you’re too old to pivot

and too crystalized

to overcome 30 years

of known methods

and you don’t know how to begin

what isn’t known to be true

from the 20 others around you.

All of us have to learn how to begin again sometimes…

…Becoming

Becoming

Becoming…

Retribution is only for the petrified soul or the decimated revolutionary spirit.

Those that seak power and punish the oppressed are ossified

In contempt for themselves,

Because to do that is to be totally and violentally at war

With what you can recognize in another’s eyes

And the dignity worth fighting for

You can only deliberately snuff out life

If you hate your own

And want everyone else to feel the same

Because you can’t imagine anyone else

Truly can feel different than you do

As the lonliest person around

Getting help

(for these people)

is holding leverage over others

The only way to connect

That must be hell

But it doesn’t mean we should have to live in it.

Inevitability is only for the Gods and the decrepit in spirit

Mortal struggles are the divine nature we were borne to engage in

We are the test of where Nature goes.

Don’t sit back.

That wouldn’t be any fun.

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Lamentations of a Sick Day